>when it comes to decentralized hosting, for example if your server goes down, then i've heard good things about IPFS and tahoe-lafs
Have a look at this: https://codeberg.org/fediverse/fep/src/branch/main/fep/ef61/fep-ef61.md. With this federation protocol improvement we can have redundancy in ActivityPub (i.e. if your server goes down you can switch to another one without losing your identity). It will nicely work with I2P too.
>it can be linked to a bitcoin or monero wallet (or lightning node?
Monero and Ethereum, but Ethereum will be removed very soon.