Notices by Alice McFlurry (alice@beige.party)

I love dim sum, but I'm really bad at using chopsticks and I’m always dropping things so I guess you dim sum you lose some.

If Meta/facebook/threads has taught me anything, it's that the customer is always wrong.

Everyone seems to be obsessed with passive income but I’m set on passive-aggressive income, so you should probably pay me back if you care even the slightest amount about our friendship and how much I thought it meant to you.

It's not reassuring that doctors and lawyers only practice.

Happy Transgender Day of Visibility, friends!

🏳️⚧️ #TransgenderDayOfVisibility

You didn't actually survive that near-miss or accident or near-death experience; you're just living in the alternate reality where you *think* you got lucky and are still alive.

I walk pretty much everywhere in Oakland and I started noticing a weird trend where there were a LOT of free chairs on the sidewalks, so I started taking photos and compiling them into a series called “Chairs of Oakland.”

I have way more than 100 photos, but I tried to compile some of my favorites into a main grid and then made a little honorable mentions grid for the more questionable “chairs” of Oakland.

Special thanks to @blankfrank for reminding me about this little project!

I only use my Bluesky account to remind those poor people that there are better options out there.

Oh no. I am so sorry to all of the people who followed me for “wholesome stories about Mastodon friendship” only to be subjected to “suggestive photos of finger banging.”

I didn’t add a CW because there’s nothing wrong with fingers joining together in harmony, CAROL IN HR!

I wonder what it feels like to not have a compulsion to vocalize every single thought that comes to mind.

I think you should be able to say whatever you want as long as your words aren’t harmful to others, especially on Mastodon where you’re not requiring the commitment of conversation. If people don’t like it, they can ignore, mute, or block, but that’s on them.

I was just reminded of the time when @KevBot and I found a free photo booth in a casino bingo hall and we would go there all of the time and take stupid photos until one day when our friend was driving down the highway and saw our faces on a gigantic billboard and we realized the photo booth was only free because we were trading our consent to use the photos for marketing purposes.

When I was six, I asked for a pair of roller skates for Christmas. On Christmas morning, I opened my present to find a single roller skate.

I knew my parents didn’t have a lot of money, so I was still grateful and determined to make it work and I thanked my mom and dad and went outside to play with my roller skate.

I proceeded to “skate” along the curb with the roller skate on my right foot and my sneaker on my left foot and I was honestly having a blast when my mom came outside.

Mom: Uhhh…what are you doing?
Me: I’m roller skating, mom!
Mom: Yeah, but why are you only wearing one of your roller skates?
Me: There are TWO skates?!?

It turns out my mom wrapped the roller skates separately to give me more presents to open, but the other roller skate got buried in the Christmas morning shuffle and nobody noticed because I didn’t say anything about only receiving one roller skate.

Today marks ten years since I lost my mom and, every so often, I remember that day because it was so very her, doing whatever she could with what she had, even if it meant wrapping presents separately to make me feel like I had more.

If your mom is still around, hold her tightly. If she’s gone, remember the good times fondly.