Conservatives on the campaign trail: This whole libertarian "live and let live" is just not realistic. You can't compromise with all these communist democrats running around.

Conservatives in office: It was really difficult but we finally reached an agreement to only raise taxes 20% so we can do the patriotic thing and fight the 17th war, but we secured key concessions that straight people will now be allowed to be school teachers, and illegal immigrants who commit murder will be cut off from welfare.