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Guy collapsed at work today, he was turning purple and I had to call 911 and give him CPR, freaked me out man, might have been a fent overdose. One of my nightmares is dying at work. I just don't know anymore man, people are fucked up and fucked up things are happening. Makes you really re-evaluate things.
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That's good advice, normally I've been in a good mood and accepting of my situation, my life is good now and I shouldn't lose sight of that. But sometimes it's so hard to ignore how fucked up things get and to try not to let it weight you down.
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I don't know why I'm telling you guys this, I like to joke around and shitpost and stuff but lately it's just getting really apparent how much the rot has set in and how obvious it is when you're around some people. Things are bad, I used to be able to see beauty in all this ugliness but it's been real fucking hard lately. And the feeling that you can't do anything to stop it is overwhelming.
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I've felt fairly despondent and hopeless over the last 4 years, but in the last month my mood has improved a lot, but maybe it's just because it's that time of year. I think I know exactly what you've been feeling. I think it's a matter of perspective. Things are bad and they're just going to get worse. But, neither you nor I can fix the world, and maybe we shouldn't stress about how we can't. But we do have knowledge about the reality of this world, and maybe we can act on it, and manipulate it for our own benefit. You have a network in places like these that you can use to air your grievances and strategize. Small victories are important right now, so focus on those that you can win for now.