In Greece, Demetrius, Stratocles, or effeminate Haemus: They’re a nation of comics. Laugh, and they’ll be shaken With fits of laughter. They weep, without grief, if they see A friend in tears; if you pine for a little warmth in the winter They don a cloak; if you remark “it’s hot” they’ll start to sweat. So we’re unequal: they’ve a head start who always, day or night, Can adopt the expression they see on someone’s face, Who’re always ready to throw up their hands and cheer If their ‘friend’ belches deeply, or perhaps pisses straight, Or gives a fart when the golden bowl’s turned upside down.
Besides, nothing’s sacred to them or safe from their cocks Not the lady of the house, or the virgin daughter, not Even her smooth-faced fiancé, or the unbroken son. Failing that, they’ll have the friend’s grandma on her back.