I’m going to let all of you anons in here in on a little secret. Did you know that when niggers talk about “seasoning” they are exclusively referring to “Lawry’s Seasoned Salt?”

I’m not joking, it’s an honest to God fact. Next time you get on the subject of cooking while chatting with a nigger ask him what his favorite seasonings are to use while cooking. He’ll stare at you mouth agape before mumbling out some incoherent nigger speak like

“ion no, I ain’t no gorton ramsay nigga haha nah mean? I’m just usin seasoning nigga”

Niggers really have no concept of seasoning, they honestly think all flavor is derived from Lawry’s Seasoning Salt. One time I was invited to my nigger neighbor’s 4th of July bbq. I could hardly contain my excitement because I was finally about to be enlightened by the fabled black BBQ, or so I thought.

Imagine my disappointment when I arrived and was greeted with the following

>chicken rubbed with lawry’s seasoned salt

>ribs with dry rub of lawry’s seasoned salt and paprika

>mashed potatoes loaded with lawry’s seasoned salt

>salad garnished with lawry’s seasoned salt

>asparagus coated in so much lawry’s seasoned salt that it was entirely crystallized by the time it was done grilling

>every table had a bottle of lawry’s seasoned salt on it “to add some extra seasoning

It was absolutely unreal. Do you know how many times I was asked to “pass the seasoning” that night? It can’t be counted on both hands. Describing the situation as Lynchian is too kind.

If you ever find yourself dating a black girl and want to impress her grill up some chicken and rub it with enough Lawry’s Seasoned Salt to cure an entire calf. You will be amazed at her eyes light up as she takes her first bite and she showers you with compliments for “cookin’ with soul.”