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1. Rasterman (rasterman@detroitriotcity.com)'s status on Tuesday, 09-Jan-2024 23:33:39 JST Rasterman
   Something big-ish happened in New York.
   
   It seems a Chabad synagogue was found to contain a secret tunnel and when police went in to investigate, the jews inside chimped out and tried to cover it, resulting in a scuffle.
   
   Some jews were arrested. For some reason they removed a mattress from the tunnel.
   
   It's doing the rounds on Twitter:
   
   https://twitter.com/rawsalerts/status/1744536722078044399
   
   https://twitter.com/jakeshieldsajj/status/1744572950102356419
   
   Unrelated(?) but a jew was jacking it in the train and now he's wanted:
   
   https://twitter.com/NYPDTips/status/1744564097473970358