Notices by Flashdancer (flash@mastodon.world)

Me: Hi, I’d like a wake-up call.

Operator: The seven hottest days in the last 100,000 years all happened in the last week.

I just broke a light bulb dammit, is that seven years of bad ideas?

Home security reminder.
A lot of people are arranging to go away for Christmas which makes their homes easy pickings for burglars. For security reasons I strongly recommend that you leave one of your children behind to construct a series of elaborate booby traps and defend your property.

Amazing!

Day-old hedgehogs.

Be sure to follow the instructions when assembling your dog.