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1. veff :trash: (veff@poa.st)'s status on Saturday, 18-Mar-2023 06:01:51 JST veff :trash:

   • Giganova8 :sob2: :nacho_dead:

   I think this is an unfortunate side-effect of helicopter parents. It’s very easy for kids to take interest in capeshit/vidya or other dead-end hobbies and while I can’t speak for everyone, I know my parents did their best to try and shame me from enjoying those things as a way to help me become a productive person, and instead of listening to them I made the retarded decision to simply hide my interests from them altogether.
   
   RT: https://varishangout.net/objects/6e70e649-3ef6-4743-82ca-981de8a79e79

   • Woggy's Zeonic Frolicks (washedoutgundampilot@poa.st)'s status on Saturday, 18-Mar-2023 06:01:50 JST Woggy's Zeonic Frolicks

     in reply to

     • Giganova8 :sob2: :nacho_dead:

     @Giganova8 @veff Parents screw up by not exposing their kid to eugenic interests, though. A good dad should be giving his children a breadth of hobby exposure to see what things really sink in, things that are worthy of spending those rare years of a hungry brain and budding talent.

     Parents bitch that their sons spend all day on the xbox without ever presenting them a better hobby to try out. What do they expect? “go outside” only goes so far.

     Better to go rent dirt bikes, or go karts, buy an intro lesson to a couple instruments, take them to grandpa’s and have them build something in the shop, ANYTHING

   • Giganova8 :sob2: :nacho_dead: (giganova8@varishangout.net)'s status on Saturday, 18-Mar-2023 06:01:51 JST Giganova8 :sob2: :nacho_dead:

     in reply to

     @veff Honestly, the “shaming” is the problem. Your parents fucked up when, instead of trying to ensure you balanced work and fun, and didn’t pigeon-hole yourself into some psycho niche hobby, they tried to shame you out of it. All’s that does is create resentment and the very “post-ironic” attitude that’s become such a problem.

     Frankly, we need to stop dogpiling people with odd or niche but harmless interests, simply because those interests aren’t popular or monetizable. Otherwise, you end up with modern soyboys who have no real opinions, and just mindlessly consoom whatever is churned out by the approved sources.

     (Of course, discouraging fucked-up things is still desirable, but better tactics are clearly needed than simple “name and shame”)

   • Giganova8 :sob2: :nacho_dead: (giganova8@varishangout.net)'s status on Saturday, 18-Mar-2023 06:07:59 JST Giganova8 :sob2: :nacho_dead:

     in reply to

     • Woggy's Zeonic Frolicks
     @WashedOutGundamPilot @veff
     Exactly. Shame without anything to back it up is the problem.
     
     They shouldn't be saying "you spend all day on vidya, you're a disappointment!", so much as "Hey, wanna come try something new? You might like it more than your games!" All the former does is create a kid who's very good at hiding his interests and pretending to do what his parents want.
     
     And realistically, spending some of your time on a "useless" hobby isn't the end of the world. Pursuing productivity at all costs will cost you far more than just accepting a little goofing off. :shrug:
     Woggy's Zeonic Frolicks likes this.
   • veff :trash: (veff@poa.st)'s status on Saturday, 18-Mar-2023 06:09:43 JST veff :trash:

     in reply to

     • Giganova8 :sob2: :nacho_dead:
     @Giganova8 Yeah, while I agree with you, I can't blame them for their efforts. In retrospect, my mother spent my whole childhood playing wack-a-mole with potentially harmful habits and interests that my siblings and I picked up, which was a losing game due to the sheer speed of things accessible online in one way or another. Of course, she tried to ban/limit the Internet outright, but I thank her for teaching me hacking/social engineering in a very roundabout way.
     
     If she did not restrict certain hobbies I'm certain I would have turned out groomed like a lot of kids nowadays. I just wish she wasn't so heavy-handed as to block me from feeling comfortable exploring things I *would* be passionate about many years down the line.
     luithe likes this.
   • EssentialUtinsil :njp: (essentialutinsil@poa.st)'s status on Saturday, 18-Mar-2023 06:14:03 JST EssentialUtinsil :njp:

     in reply to

     • Woggy's Zeonic Frolicks
     • Giganova8 :sob2: :nacho_dead:
     @WashedOutGundamPilot @Giganova8 @veff I don't get it.
     I have my boy with me doing everything that I can do while wrangling a toddler. Every morning I tell him it's time to go do our chores (open the barn, feed the birds, make my lunch before work, etc) and he gets so excited. We practice letters, animal sounds, etc. while I'm doing stuff and he can already do most of the alphabet and probably 20 different animals. It's the best thing ever to have the privilege and responsibility of teaching him as much as I can about everything. I'm not trying to brag about my super parenting skills, I literally don't understand parents that don't have this drive.
     Woggy's Zeonic Frolicks likes this.
   • Woggy's Zeonic Frolicks (washedoutgundampilot@poa.st)'s status on Saturday, 18-Mar-2023 06:14:55 JST Woggy's Zeonic Frolicks

     in reply to

     • Giganova8 :sob2: :nacho_dead:
     • EssentialUtinsil :njp:

     @EssentialUtinsil @Giganova8 @veff Health? Seems like a lot of people are impatient, tired, drawn out, and that largely stems from a lack of fitness. If you have energy, you have more patience, you have more investment in bringing the kid along even if it adds 5 minutes

   • veff :trash: (veff@poa.st)'s status on Saturday, 18-Mar-2023 06:17:34 JST veff :trash:

     in reply to

     • Woggy's Zeonic Frolicks
     • Giganova8 :sob2: :nacho_dead:
     • EssentialUtinsil :njp:

     @EssentialUtinsil @WashedOutGundamPilot @Giganova8 Good on you, I’m jealous. I became an uncle a few years back and have been pretty heartbroken to see him being raised by an iPad. I never expected such shit parenting from my own family I grew up with and there’s nothing I can do at the moment to intervene. He’s shown “autistic tendencies” and they’ve talked to the doctor about what to do, apparently unable or unwilling to simply take away the constant stimulus that’s wrecking his little brain.

     Woggy's Zeonic Frolicks likes this.
   • Woggy's Zeonic Frolicks (washedoutgundampilot@poa.st)'s status on Saturday, 18-Mar-2023 06:18:54 JST Woggy's Zeonic Frolicks

     in reply to

     • Giganova8 :sob2: :nacho_dead:
     • EssentialUtinsil :njp:

     @veff @EssentialUtinsil @Giganova8 We inadvertantly built up our home as the place for the extended fam kids to hang out. Gives them a change of pace and I have a lot more latitude to give them tasking than their gay moms, so when the boys come around they get a workout (since they haven’t figured out there’s not much reason to move a bunch of haybales from A to B back and forth) and a chance to focus on non-tech stuff

   • veff :trash: (veff@poa.st)'s status on Saturday, 18-Mar-2023 06:22:38 JST veff :trash:

     in reply to

     • Woggy's Zeonic Frolicks
     • Giganova8 :sob2: :nacho_dead:
     • EssentialUtinsil :njp:

     @Giganova8 @EssentialUtinsil @WashedOutGundamPilot Tell me about it. I’m halfway across the world and can’t do anything other than chide.

     Woggy's Zeonic Frolicks likes this.
   • Giganova8 :sob2: :nacho_dead: (giganova8@varishangout.net)'s status on Saturday, 18-Mar-2023 06:22:39 JST Giganova8 :sob2: :nacho_dead:

     in reply to

     • Woggy's Zeonic Frolicks
     • EssentialUtinsil :njp:
     @veff @EssentialUtinsil @WashedOutGundamPilot
     >"autistic tendencies"
     >brain-fried by iPad parenting
     
     Unspeakable rage rn :mumei_calamity:
   • Woggy's Zeonic Frolicks (washedoutgundampilot@poa.st)'s status on Saturday, 18-Mar-2023 06:24:06 JST Woggy's Zeonic Frolicks

     in reply to

     • Giganova8 :sob2: :nacho_dead:
     • EssentialUtinsil :njp:

     @veff @EssentialUtinsil @Giganova8 IDK, really depends on your career path. I’m behind the curve because of a late 20’s career shift. With the right course you could do it by 30, enough of my friends did.

   • veff :trash: (veff@poa.st)'s status on Saturday, 18-Mar-2023 06:24:07 JST veff :trash:

     in reply to

     • Woggy's Zeonic Frolicks
     • Giganova8 :sob2: :nacho_dead:
     • EssentialUtinsil :njp:

     @WashedOutGundamPilot @EssentialUtinsil @Giganova8 How long does it take to attain such a position in life? You’re describing my dream right now, but I’m still a relatively young zoomer just trying to stay afloat.

   • Woggy's Zeonic Frolicks (washedoutgundampilot@poa.st)'s status on Saturday, 18-Mar-2023 07:42:31 JST Woggy's Zeonic Frolicks

     in reply to

     • Giganova8 :sob2: :nacho_dead:
     • EssentialUtinsil :njp:

     @EssentialUtinsil @veff @Giganova8 So glad we only had the library. I’m half thinking that’s gonna be my kids’ media. Music, books, limited screen time to like 2 hrs at night w/ family

   • EssentialUtinsil :njp: (essentialutinsil@poa.st)'s status on Saturday, 18-Mar-2023 07:42:32 JST EssentialUtinsil :njp:

     in reply to

     • Woggy's Zeonic Frolicks
     • Giganova8 :sob2: :nacho_dead:
     @veff @WashedOutGundamPilot @Giganova8 My nephew is the same way. Parents didn’t want to parent, started giving him a tablet to watch his shows, now that’s just their go-to whenever they need to ignore him. He’s got some big behavioral red flags that they don’t do anything about, and then they put him in daycare and were raving about how much better he has been (now that somebody else is in charge of raising their kid).
   • EssentialUtinsil :njp: (essentialutinsil@poa.st)'s status on Saturday, 18-Mar-2023 07:47:13 JST EssentialUtinsil :njp:

     in reply to

     • Woggy's Zeonic Frolicks
     • Giganova8 :sob2: :nacho_dead:
     @WashedOutGundamPilot @veff @Giganova8 That’s what we agreed on. Kid can watch certain things when we’re present but we’re not gonna get into this bullshit of him ‘watching his shows’. He’s actually pretty indifferent to stuff being on, he’ll watch for a little bit then go on playing. That is something I’m always keeping an eye on, I don’t want him getting ‘sucked in’. He loves books & music, I don’t think we’re gonna have a problem for a while until he’s older and has a hard time fitting in with ‘normal’ kids.
     Woggy's Zeonic Frolicks likes this.
   • Woggy's Zeonic Frolicks (washedoutgundampilot@poa.st)'s status on Saturday, 18-Mar-2023 07:48:54 JST Woggy's Zeonic Frolicks

     in reply to

     • Giganova8 :sob2: :nacho_dead:
     • EssentialUtinsil :njp:

     @EssentialUtinsil @veff @Giganova8 I’m probably gonna use media as a jumping off point for play, just to foster his imagination. I’ll get him some toys and make it so he’ll ‘charge it up’ with some exposure to watchable stuff, but primarily push him to build his own stories & worlds.

     As long as he knows how to be funny, he’ll be set. Not quite sure how to foster that, but if you have a funny kid things go much easier for him

   • Giganova8 :sob2: :nacho_dead: (giganova8@varishangout.net)'s status on Saturday, 18-Mar-2023 08:05:07 JST Giganova8 :sob2: :nacho_dead:

     in reply to

     • Woggy's Zeonic Frolicks
     • EssentialUtinsil :njp:
     @WashedOutGundamPilot @EssentialUtinsil @veff
     That's kinda what my parents did. I got vidya, but it was limited mostly to older (and thusly cheaper) stuff, without online connectivity of any kind. IDK how well it ultimately worked, given that I have no idea how many of my issues are "learned" vs. "born", but I sure seem better off than the iPad generation is. :noa_shock:
     Woggy's Zeonic Frolicks likes this.
   • Woggy's Zeonic Frolicks (washedoutgundampilot@poa.st)'s status on Saturday, 18-Mar-2023 08:07:00 JST Woggy's Zeonic Frolicks

     in reply to

     • Giganova8 :sob2: :nacho_dead:
     • EssentialUtinsil :njp:

     @Giganova8 @EssentialUtinsil @veff I’m gonna treat vidya like a special gacha event, only around for a week every so often